I don’t even need your love but you treat me like a stranger.

“Now and then I think of when we were together, like when you said you felt so happy you could die.
I told myself that you were right for me, but felt so lonely in your company.
But that was love and it’s an ache I still remember.
You can get addicted to a certain kinda sadness, like resignation to the end, always the end.
So when we found that we could not make sense, well you said that we would still be friends
But I’ll admit that I was glad that it was over.”

Oh I don’t love you but I always will.

Oh your hands can heal, your hands can bruise,
I don’t have a choice but I still choose you.

“The past can’t hurt you anymore. Not unless you let it. They made you into a victim, Evey. They made you into a statistic. But, that’s not the real you. That’s not who you are inside.”

-Alan Moore

Jazreel: Why you don’t like him, is it because he’s a man united fan?

Me: Eh how you know!

Jazreel: HAHA I anyhow say one!

—

I know you’re reading this, you know me so well bb, you’re the only man united fan I have eyes for. (; LMAO.

1st March

• Freedommmm! A short lived one until I have to start on the 3 essays due after Easter + studying for exams.
• I just want to rot in my room and watch my shows tbh.
• I’ve stopped watching BBT because I think it’s getting really boring and the show lost its soul when they made Sheldon fall in love. ._.
• Thinking of changing course to pure Archaeology or Archaeology & Ancient History. I know it’s so risky and all, but they’ll have a study tour (as a module) next year, think Egypt!
• Chicken.com is my safe haven lmao.
• Worcester yesterday was beautiful and listening to the year 3s talk about dissertation is freaking me out already.
• 2 more weeks left in school, how did year 1 fly by so quickly?!
• Feeling old because I’m feeling extremely lazy to party.
• Read my 2009/2010 livejournal posts, I feel so stupid. I was so naive/hopeful about my future with J, it’s weird how I could be so happy about the future and now that I’m in the future looking back, it makes me feel really stupid. How could I think that, even for one second, there could be a happily ever after.
• However, I do remember convincing myself why I should take the chance with him even though everyone was telling me not to. I told myself that I’d rather it be my own mistake than someone else’s, plus I’m still young so I can afford mistakes like that. Now I know..

Self-love

Don’t love out of convenience, don’t love out of habit, don’t love our of familiarity, don’t love out of history, don’t love out of pity, don’t love out of lust, don’t love out of replacement, don’t love out of options, don’t love a second best. Because in the end, what you settle for reflects how much you love yourself.

27th Feb

I’ve been watching too much kpop nonsense for my own good, noooo I don’t wanna go down that route. It all started with Running Man and now I’ve moved on to watching 2pm videos because of Nichkhun. Lmao. But to be fair, I still don’t like their music so I’m still on the bright side, for now at least. Anyway, 3 episodes later, my essay is still untouched, well done Amanda for getting your priorities right. Side note, Jeannie totally jinxed me with her “you don’t ever see him” comment because I rarely, almost never, bump into him or anything of that sort. But ever since her comment, I’ve bumped into him 3 times in a week, thanks Jeannie. Lmao. Or maybe it’s divine intervention asking me to man up and face my fears. Anyway, back to my essay for now, no sleep till I reach 1000 words and I’ll end off with a too-cute-I-can-die gif. Teehee.

Just Saying

The enemy of your enemy is your friend.

The enemy of your friend is not your friend.

The friend of your enemy could be your friend.

YNWA. 2012 CARLING CUP CHAMPIONS.

Most frustrating/heart attacking 3 hours I had but when they finally won it, the feeling is indescribable. (‘: Liverpool needs to stop putting the fans through penalties but nonetheless, well done lads! Well done to Cardiff as well. The funniest (and also the most asshole) comment I’ve seen was “And Gerrard saves Liverpool again” (referring to Anthony Gerrard). Plus Alonso’s tweet makes it even more (‘: But yes, silverware after 6 long years. (‘: BEST WEEKEND EVER.

25th Feb

• Stratford Upon Avon!
• Most amazing time spent with my two amazing future flatmates heh.
• Easily one of the best days in this country.
• Understood the importance of travelling with the right people, I really doubt anyone can stand travelling with us. lmao.
• Back in Brum, back to reality, back to essay woes.
• Archaeology field trip next Wednesday, whoopeeee!
• Carling Cup Finals tomorrow, excitessssss! High chance of a sign of silverware for Liverpool, finally, fingers crossed!
• Freeing my heart of any form of attachment, except to those who deserves it.
• Throat hurts, please don’t tell me I’m falling ill again. zzzzzzz.